tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-106001532024-03-13T04:48:15.114-06:00Brittle Crazy Glassmelted sand, a maker's hand, fragile life reflects true lightMollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.comBlogger1169125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-21132723947292127892017-07-15T22:38:00.000-06:002017-07-15T22:38:58.376-06:00This One Goes Out to all those Mommy Blog Posts Telling Moms To Put On Their Swimming Suits and to Play in the Water With Their KidsI just updated my Facebook profile picture. This is it:<br />
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As we all know, sometimes the Internet is great, and sometimes, as Abraham Lincoln famously reminded us, we can't believe everything we read on the Internet. Like, for example, the wasp sting on my ankle that is currently swollen to twice my ankle's normal size; the Internet "help" has been less than successful so far. See, also: parenting advice.</div>
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Yesterday, though, I heeded Mother Internet's reminders to worry less about myself and live a little for and with my kids. You see, I've never been a water sports person. I'm pretty sure the last time I tried water skiing, I got such a bad wedgie I actually could feel it in my throat. No success, and no fun. I don't like putting my face in the water, and when I would occasionally jump into a pool, I would do so with my nose plugged.</div>
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I'm trying hard not to pass this down to my kids. I actually bribed my two big kids on Thursday with ice cream to put their faces in the water. I had to reinforce the lesson. So on Friday, I got in the water. I was, quite frankly, terrified of what it would feel like when I took that inevitable first fall. I didn't love it, but it was okay. And each successive fall was a little less bad. And look at me! I'm surfing, and I'm having boatloads (har har) of fun!</div>
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I got in the water to show my kids that getting your face wet (literally and metaphorically) is a little risk that can yield great rewards. I guess I needed the lesson as much as they did.</div>
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(By the way, my kids got to get out of the boat, too. Lili declared it the "best day ever.")</div>
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Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-10844799708159207932017-07-11T09:17:00.003-06:002017-07-11T09:17:25.447-06:00The Fear of GodI am slowly working my way through Tim Keller's book <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Prayer-Experiencing-Awe-Intimacy-God/dp/0143108581/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1499785633&sr=8-1&keywords=prayer+keller"><i>Prayer</i></a>, and I thought this explanation of the fear of God was fantastic. The fear of the Lord is such a hard concept to grasp and even harder (I think) to explain to others, but I was able to use the gist of this to encourage my kids to be more reverent (as in, sit still and stop praying about farts - keepin' it real) in our family prayer time last night.<br />
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What, then, should a Christian be afraid of regarding God? Think of it like this. Imagine that you are suddenly introduced to some person you have always admired enormously - perhaps someone you have hero-worshipped. You reach out to shake her hand and suddenly it hits you. You can't believe you are actually meeting her. You discover to your embarrassment that you are trembling and sweating, and when you try to speak, you are out of breath. What is going on? You are not afraid of being hurt, or punished. Rather, you are genuinely afraid of doing something stupid or saying something that is inappropriate to the person and the occasion. Your joyful admiration has a fearful aspect to it. You are in awe, and therefore you don't want to mess up.</blockquote>
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... We could say that fear of punishment is a self-absorbed kind of fear. It happens to people wrapped up in themselves. Those who believe the gospel - who believe that they are the recipients of undeserved but unshakable grace - grow in a paradoxically loving yet joyful fear. Because of unutterable love and joy in God, we tremble with the privilege of being in his presence and with an intense longing to honor him when we are there. We are deeply afraid of grieving him. To put it another way - you would be quite afraid if someone put a beautiful, priceless, ancient Ming dynasty vase in your hands. You wouldn't be trembling with fear about the vase hurting you, but about you hurting <i>it</i>. Of course, we can't really harm God, but a Christian should be intensely concerned not to grieve or dishonor the one who is so glorious and who did so much for us.</blockquote>
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Tim Keller, <i><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Prayer-Experiencing-Awe-Intimacy-God/dp/0143108581/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1499785633&sr=8-1&keywords=prayer+keller">Prayer</a></i>, pp 98-99</blockquote>
<i></i><i></i><br />Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-63550470897156080442017-05-22T15:10:00.001-06:002017-05-22T15:14:39.825-06:00I Can Only ImagineOne of the things I didn't anticipate about motherhood is the kids' constant planning of birthday parties.<br />
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We have literally hosted one legit birthday party, ever; and yet our lives seem to be a constant verbal stream of "this will be my birthday theme" and "this will be my birthday cake flavor/decoration" and "this is who I want to invite to my birthday party."<br />
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Interestingly, their ideas for birthday party themes and decorations only extend as far as their experience of the same. <a href="http://www.brittlecrazyglass.com/2015/10/that-giant-sprinkle-cake-in-sky.html">When Lili turned three</a>, I went all out and did the Pinterest coated-in-sprinkles cake, and it blew her mind. She talked about it all year and wanted the same cake for her fourth birthday, along with the same Dollar Store butterfly decorations. She literally could not imagine anything better.<br />
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As my kids were rehashing the highlights of a recent birthday cake that we made for a friend - it had Haribo gummy frogs on top of it, and now they want frogs on their birthday cakes - it struck me that our imaginations really are<span style="font-family: inherit;"> quite limited when it comes to "as good as it gets." As CS Lewis famously said, "<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818;">It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at th</span><span style="background-color: white;">e sea. We are far too easily pleased.”</span></span><br />
<br /><br />Then there's this promise straight from Scripture: <blockquote class="tr_bq">
“What no eye has seen, nor ear heard,<br />nor the heart of man imagined,<br />what God has prepared for those who love him” (1 Cor 2:9)</blockquote>
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"Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen." (Ephesians 3:20-21).</blockquote>
<br />It's hard to imagine, but faith assures us that this is true.<br /><br />Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-13671875133368803292017-05-14T05:53:00.002-06:002017-05-14T05:59:40.792-06:00When I Became a Mom<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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When I became a mom, my relationship with nearly everything changed.<br />
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The world at once became more simple (the joy of a sprinkler) and more complex (a trip to the grocery store). The world became more silly and more scary, more busy and more still, and I see myself as more sinful and more sanctified.<br />
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My husband became daddy. I see more of his gifts, more of his love - reasons for marrying him that I didn't even know existed.<br />
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My mom and mother-in-law became grandmas. They serve even more, I see more of their talents, more of their hearts.<br />
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I see more of my own heart, and it's often not good. But it's necessary, because in this I also see more of my Savior, and He is good.<br />
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Tim Keller has an idea in his work on marriage that we should view our spouse through heavenly eyes, as in, through the lens of what our spouse will be like in Glory, when their sin and weaknesses have been stripped away and their strengths have been fully sanctified. His point is that - through Christ - we are a primary agent in helping our spouse along that path here on earth.<br />
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Raising children is part of this path. You wouldn't think it if you saw my house at an average lunchtime... or naptime ... or bedtime. But there is a lot of peeling back the unwelcome bits, and I know the constant demands of motherhood are making me more human, since our infinitely-giving Jesus is the model for true humanity.<br />
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I am also more fully human in suffering alongside others as a mom. I share your joys and your sorrows, and my heart grows bigger for all joys and sorrows. I lost a tiny babe at seven weeks recently, and I suddenly joined a whole host of sisters who comfort me with the comfort that they themselves have received from God (2 Cor 1:4).<br />
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This life is about us: we have a God who crafts every detail, who wipes every tear, who died for and was raised to life for and who calls particular people. It's also so much <i>not</i> about us: our purpose is to love and serve and to give up our lives for the sake of others, to the glory of God. God uses many paths to teach us these lessons - I know several childless women whose lives of love and service are exemplary - but for me, motherhood has put this call into stark relief because without these three kids, I would take the easy path, and I would be missing out.<br />
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I'm grateful today, Mother's Day, that God has called me to the abundant life - not just happiness and ease, but true abundance - through being a mom. I'm grateful for my own moms and many others who have walked further down this path before me, and who have done it with diligence and reverence and joy.<br />
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Happy Mother's Day!<br />
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<br />Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-48546442212209734532016-11-15T20:43:00.000-07:002016-11-15T20:43:03.683-07:00Up-to-the-New Year ResolutionsI took Facebook off of my phone the day after the election, and I feel like I've regained so much of my life that I'm inspired to make a whole list of resolutions that are wildly unambitious but inspiring nonetheless.<br />
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So, between now and the New Year, I resolve to:<br />
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1) Update this blog. (Maybe more ambitious than I realize, given the fact that the last time I tried to update was at the last New Year, and it literally broke my computer. That can be a blog post for another day.)<br />
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2) Make holiday-scented playdough. Mint, cinnamon, or both.<br />
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3) Drink a lot of mulled wine.<br />
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4) Resume the <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ECxYJcnvyMw">7-minute workout </a>at least twice a week. Like I said, wildly unambitious. I was actually doing really well at it right up until I got pregnant with Elese. She's almost 2 and now that I have a huge yard, I don't even take my kids out for walks.<br />
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5) Read a book to Elese when I want to strangle her. (I hope CPS isn't reading this; if you are, I promise, I'll never do that. But if you knew her, you might understand the impulse.)<br />
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6) Put away Elese's clean clothes.<br />
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7) Write to a friend.<br />
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8) Unpack the junk drawer box that's in the corner of my dining area. If not unpacked by 12/31/16, I shall throw it in the garbage in its entirety.<br />
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9) Let my kids stay up too late for something fun and Christmas-y.<br />
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10) Give something that brings joy to someone who doesn't expect it.Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-65851606800081443622016-08-01T09:57:00.003-06:002016-08-01T09:59:10.754-06:00By Faith this Mountain Shall be MovedWhenever we visit Target, my son begs to go down the Lego aisle. He examines as many boxes as he can. He holds them reverently. He imagines using long-spent Christmas money on new sets. He suggests buying them as gifts for his dad. And he nearly always leaves empty-handed.<br />
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I'm a big meanie.<br />
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Of course, I have very good reasons for this, reasons that are connected to my larger goals as a parent. My job as mom is to help my children learn to be content with what they have, to be good stewards, to not spend money they don't have, to know the satisfaction of working hard to earn something and the value of delayed gratification. But, at the moment, all he hears in that Lego aisle is, "no."<br />
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I've been contemplating lately how this helps me better understand God's purposes in parenting me. When I hear, "By Faith this Mountain Shall be Moved," am I envisioning the mountain of what I want and am not getting, or do I have the imagination to believe that God might be moving a bigger mountain, one with eternal and gospel significance. <br />
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"By faith we see the hand of God ... We'll walk by faith and not by sight."<br />
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I keep having to learn this lesson over and over (again, not too different from my earthly parenting).
<iframe width="420" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/jNIx__JGLGs" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-55946024210721844952015-11-09T20:12:00.001-07:002015-11-09T20:12:40.278-07:00When You Need It MostIt is one thing to talk boldly about the Gospel when you have a comfortable perch and feel like you are doing pretty well on your own.<br />
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It is another thing when you feel the acute sting of failure, and the spectre of self-loathing stalks your every move. It is so hard to preach the Gospel to yourself when you want to have done better, you don't want to believe that you're actually that weak and needy.<br />
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This is when it is the hardest, but this is when you need it most.<br />
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[If we're going to split hairs, you actually need the Good News that Christ died for your sins -- the Gospel -- all the time, so thank God that he gives you melt downs so you recognize your need. But let's not split hairs right now, okay? Let's just thank God for grace, grace, grace, when we know we need it and even when we don't.]Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-16819211947871378522015-10-31T11:55:00.004-06:002015-11-02T07:11:10.804-07:00That Giant Sprinkle Cake in the Sky<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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So, my middle child turned three earlier this month, and even though we just do family dinners for birthdays at this age, I wanted it to be special. When I showed her a Pinterest picture of a cake covered with sprinkles and her eyes lit up, I knew that this was the thing. All afternoon and evening of the big day, her whole face shone when she looked at the cake, and every picture is "marred" by her stealing tiny bits of sprinkles and putting them in her mouth.<br />
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-2ITEuma5GiE/VjT_iq6vJQI/AAAAAAAAEIM/5hFHcO17xlM/s1600/DSC_9599.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-2ITEuma5GiE/VjT_iq6vJQI/AAAAAAAAEIM/5hFHcO17xlM/s320/DSC_9599.JPG" width="320" /></a>What's amazing about the sprinkle cake, aside from the sheer quantity of sprinkles and how easy it is to end up with tiny, sugary balls bouncing off of your tile in every direction, is that it's not like my kids are strangers to sprinkles.<br />
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We put sprinkles on steamers for them at least a few times a week. I put sprinkles on their yogurt, sprinkles on our coconut fudge truffles, sprinkles on our hot chocolate.<br />
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-s43ojhIrWkw/VjUAE9vYDkI/AAAAAAAAEIc/Nj9XWeDn7yM/s1600/DSC_9552.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-s43ojhIrWkw/VjUAE9vYDkI/AAAAAAAAEIc/Nj9XWeDn7yM/s320/DSC_9552.JPG" width="320" /></a>It would seem that familiarity has not bred contempt. In fact, quite the opposite: through consistent, delightful exposure, Lili's heart has been trained to appreciate -- probably much more than she would have without regular exposure - a cake covered with over a pound of sprinkles.<br />
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Theologians like Jonathan Edwards, John Piper, and - my favorite author - Robert Farar Capon, teach that the same is true of delighting in God. Sure, life is not all hot chocolate and squirty whipped cream, but it's also not all liver and celery. Life is often hard: suffering precedes glory for us just as it did for Christ. But most of our lives also have sprinkles of the sweet and colorful, things in which we find joy and that reflect Christ's goodness to us even now. <i>"Taste and see that the Lord is good! Blessed is the an who takes refuge in him!" (Psalm 34:8)</i><br />
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We are people of the future. This world has been ravaged by sin, and we are grateful that it is not all there is. Eternal joy awaits. In the meanwhile, heaven is breaking through, sprinkle by sprinkle, giving us tastes of glory, encouraging us to press on, to develop appetites for what is truly good and deeply satisfying. This world is a training ground for our hearts to appreciate the overwhelming joy that is to come. You can't even imagine, but sometimes it's important to try.<br />
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Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-28900709584866651672015-10-27T22:16:00.000-06:002015-10-27T22:19:20.621-06:00Mom AnthemWe are the people of the 7:00 bedtime.<br />
<br />
We are the people with the dented walls, the crayoned walls, the inexplicably toilet papered walls.<br />
<br />
We are the people who stay up too late, either to get more more thing done, or to do nothing at all.<br />
<br />
We are the people who fear we are slowly going crazy and who loudly say with clear-eyed realism that this is not hyperbole, this is real life.<br />
<br />
We are the people who will do anything for another giggle, pay anything for a better diaper cream or sippy cup, cook anything for a sick tummy.<br />
<br />
We are balm for the littlest of broken hearts.<br />
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We are the people who cheer each other from afar, trapped at home for naps, reaching out for comfort and to support.<br />
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We are the people who say, "No, you're doing okay under that pile of laundry," and, "Have you considered using paper plates every now and then?"<br />
<br />
We are the people who die a thousand little deaths every day,<br />
without much time to pause for anything.<br />
<br />
Pause now.<br />
<br />
Breathe.<br />
<br />
We are people of the cross,<br />
as an identity and as a lifestyle.<br />
<br />
We are people of the future.<br />
We are people of hope.<br />
We are people of faith.<br />
We are people of love.<br />
<br />
We are objects of grace, we are vessels of mercy, we are not strangers to the flood, but we are also of hearts that overflow.<br />
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We are people who will wake tomorrow to mercies anew. We give of our lives because Life has been given.<br />
<br />
Sleep well, my friends, for tomorrow we love and we die and we live again.<br />
<br />Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-3870030139605764142015-10-10T11:57:00.001-06:002015-10-10T11:57:40.896-06:00To Lili, on her third birthdayDear Lili,<br />
<br />
You are three today. Some day, years and years hence, you may wonder what you were like at age three, and this is what I will tell you.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-t1POUDSa_Ig/VhlF36qBI2I/AAAAAAAAEFw/cHwaSp1KTyM/s1600/DSC_7772.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-t1POUDSa_Ig/VhlF36qBI2I/AAAAAAAAEFw/cHwaSp1KTyM/s320/DSC_7772.JPG" width="320" /></a><b>You are happy</b>. You have a nearly insatiable thirst for life, and you bring fun wherever you go. You run faster and harder, you jump higher, you splash more, you dive into your imaginative play more than almost any two-now-three-year-old I know. You feel deeply, which means your highs are very high, and your lows are very low. I think this will be a struggle for you throughout life. When the leggings that you want to wear are dirty, it takes you an hour to recover. When you are told that you aren't allowed to do something, or that something you have done has been counterproductive, you are devastated. But, you recover, and your goodnight "ugga mugga" hugs, your hollers of "good night" echoing after me as I go up the stairs every night, when we end the day on a good note, is one of the best parts of my day. When your lows are more than just dirty pants or the wrong cup, I pray that you will always be able to hold onto knowing that joy could be waiting just around the corner. Dear one, this isn't just from your mom, but it's a promise from God worth holding onto: weeping endures for the night, but joy comes in the morning.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-ccrKZd3bf9I/VhlG9EBhl3I/AAAAAAAAEGo/LXf4OxrD1Kc/s1600/DSC_8027.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-ccrKZd3bf9I/VhlG9EBhl3I/AAAAAAAAEGo/LXf4OxrD1Kc/s320/DSC_8027.JPG" width="320" /></a><b>You are unique.</b> And a little bit crazy. And it's fantastic. You have a unique sense of style, and it's clear to everyone who sees you that you have been dressing yourself for a year now. You love to wear leggings ("tights") with a skirt or dress over them, you sometimes have your shirt backwards, and you almost always have your shoes on the wrong feet. But, you have picked them out and put them on yourself. You play with the crowd if it suits you, or you play by yourself if you prefer. Please, stay unique. God made you special and all of your tastes and desires and preferences, they are all custom-designed gifts from God. If this makes you feel a little bit lonely or weird at times, lean into it. You will come out on the other side of the weirdness stronger and happier for having known and embraced who God made you to be.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-OjUin4jYX0U/VhlF_BJ4qbI/AAAAAAAAEF4/VTZZz6SQJ8I/s1600/DSC_7614.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-OjUin4jYX0U/VhlF_BJ4qbI/AAAAAAAAEF4/VTZZz6SQJ8I/s320/DSC_7614.JPG" width="213" /></a><b>You are determined.</b> You drive me crazy sometimes with your insistence that you can - and will - do something by yourself. Sometimes this determination ends in tears, but, increasingly, it ends with success. You do zippers, you do your carseat buckcle, you dress yourself and brush your own teeth, you use knives to cut grapes and butter your own toast, and when you have a two year old of your own (now three!), you will realize what an accomplishment this is. Stay determined. Life is hard, it just is. Whether you are curing cancer, climbing mountains or just facing the daily grind of another dirty diaper, another pile of laundry, and another dinner to make, or another thing gone wrong with your car or your job, part of living in a fallen world is just setting your gaze ahead and doing what needs to be done with excellence and determination. Overcome your disappointment, overcome your weariness, harness your determination, and you will be a fierce woman who always makes your mother proud.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-a-RA0P9Se6M/VhlGne7BIMI/AAAAAAAAEGg/wHNFPBxONJ8/s1600/IMG_6563.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-a-RA0P9Se6M/VhlGne7BIMI/AAAAAAAAEGg/wHNFPBxONJ8/s400/IMG_6563.JPG" width="400" /></a><b>You are nuturing.</b> I sometimes can't believe what a servant heart you have when it comes to taking care of those you love. The other day, Grampy biked to our house and you brought him not one, but two, cups of ice water. Not a day goes by when you aren't getting water or vitamins or a blanket for one of your siblings. From the day you met your sister, you have loved her deeply with a beautiful sisterly love that brings tears to my eyes as I write. One of the highlights of my year was when you met Elese and couldn't stop nuzzling her and saying over and over, "It's my baby sister." Some day, you will realize that our current culture doesn't celebrate nurturing women as much as God does. He created you to love and to nurture, and doing so doesn't make you weak but incredibly strong. "Greater love has no one than this, that she lays down her life for her friends and family." You will have the chance to show this self-sacrificial to people around you throughout your whole life. As you grow more and more, may you also grow in learning this truth: "a life of sacrificial love is one of liberty."<br />
<br />
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-qAp6Tz7rICc/VhlGf0ltXyI/AAAAAAAAEGY/HN-4DYQsJs0/s1600/DSC_7502-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-qAp6Tz7rICc/VhlGf0ltXyI/AAAAAAAAEGY/HN-4DYQsJs0/s400/DSC_7502-1.jpg" width="266" /></a><b>You are beautiful. </b>Your eyes alone can light up a whole room, not to mention how you smile with your whole face. I will tell you now and for your whole life that you are beautiful, and sometimes you will doubt me. You will tell me that I'm just saying that because I'm your mom, that I have to say nice things like that. But I really do believe it. You will be even more beautiful as you grow in grace, in gentleness, in confidence of being who God created you to be. He didn't make a mistake in crafting your eyes or your hair or your face or your body. He numbers the hairs on your head, and he also adores your smile. The culture around us has a standard of beauty that you may or may not end up fitting; that doesn't mean you can't be beautiful in your own special way, which will make you shine even more brightly than those who will try so hard to fit in. You can count on me to always be someone who is committed to helping you feel and be beautiful on both the inside and the outside. I hope you will trust me and let me be on your side in this regard.<br />
<br />
<b>You are loved.</b> Of all the things I could tell you about yourself, this is the most important. When battles rage inside of you and outside of you, I pray - oh, I pray - that you will be rooted and grounded in love. The love that we as your parents shower on you is but a shadow of the love that Jesus has for you, but it's a start, and it's a model. We love you when you are happy and when you are mad and when you are obedient and when you have deliberately disobeyed and disappointed us. Our love for you doesn't depend on how you look or how you behave. You are ours, and we love you and delight in you. When you look at pictures, when you relive memories, when you think about life when it gets tough, may it always be through the lens, first of all, of knowing that you are deeply loved. We love you, but more importantly, God loves you with his everlasting love. Your life will have ups and downs, but you will always be better off for having known and remembered that your primary identity, your security and your hope comes not from within yourself but from a love that is given to you freely, abundantly, eternally, and unchangeably. You are loved, little one, more than you will probably ever know, and I pray every day that it is this Love that will guide your life, give you hope, and give you both roots and wings.<br />
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Happy Birthday, Lili, now and always,<br />
Your Mom<br />
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Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-71592441757213660632015-09-30T15:03:00.000-06:002015-09-30T15:03:02.942-06:00Love Your Neighbor on the RoadThis post deviates a little bit from my normal writing (though I haven't posted in so long, what is "normal"?), but I feel like I've just gotta say this.<br />
<br />
As I was driving home this morning, driving gently to not cause some serious head bobbing by the sleeping baby in the backseat, I approached a roundabout intersection where I noticed a bicyclist waiting to cross. Because he was waiting at a crosswalk, and because it's actually both law and courtesy to stop for pedestrians, and because I sometimes cross the street at that very same place and know how frustrating it can be to have car after car zoom past, I stopped to let him cross.<br />
<br />
The red minivan behind me didn't appreciate my slowing, and she whipped around me and zipped past the cyclist, who was just about to inch out from the front of my car to the next lane. I shook my head in frustration because this happens all the time. Seriously, friends: All. The. Time. She maybe saved herself 30 seconds, a half-minute that she could have ended up regretting for the rest of her life.<br />
<br />
And you know what? We keep seeing these news reports of pedestrians getting hit by cars! In the last week, two teenagers have been hit by cars on the same street, and after I got home and logged on for a Facebook rant about this woman, I saw that a bicyclist had just been hit by a car several miles away.<br />
<br />
I have a theory about why this keeps happening, and it has several layers. First, it starts with simple ignorance on the part of both pedestrians and drivers. Who has the right of way? (hint: the weaker one, i.e. the pedestrian, should ALWAYS have the drivers looking out for them; on top of that, you are legally required to stop at a crosswalk if there is somebody waiting at it.)<br />
<br />
Then, there's the layer of distraction - as far as I could tell, this woman wasn't on her cell phone (or she might have rear-ended me), but that seems to be pretty common. I'm amazed at how many people I see driving around on their phones, even after my city made that illegal. They did it for a reason, folks, and it's not just to inconvenience you or to drive up city revenues.<br />
<br />
Then, there's the layer of experience. We are such a car-dependent society, that I don't think people even think about the pedestrian experience. We don't understand how vulnerable somebody on a bicycle is because we've never ridden a bike down a city street. We don't think to look for pedestrians at cross-walks because we don't actually have a scope of experience that acknowledges that people these days walk, for fun or for exercise or to get somewhere, and sometimes in the course of walking, those people have to cross streets. As far as many people are concerned, crosswalks at uncontrolled intersections simply don't exist.<br />
<br />
And, the final layer, which I think is the most problematic: the human heart. We're so caught up in ourselves, we're so busy getting somewhere, we're so busy thinking about what we're going to do when we get there or what we forgot to do where we're coming from, we simply don't have capacity in our hearts for others. There is no looking out for the interests of others, either in the home or on the road. There is no loving your neighbor as yourself because we don't know our neighbors and we don't care to know them.<br />
<br />
Dan Doriani has written a great book on interpreting the Old Testament called <i><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Putting-Truth-Work-Practice-Application/dp/0875521703/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1443645192&sr=8-1&keywords=doriani+putting+the+truth+to+work">Putting the Truth to Work</a></i>. In one helpful section, he works out some of the implications, both positive and negative, of the Ten Commandments (these are also fleshed out, less "popularly" in the Westminster Catechisms - <a href="http://www.reformed.org/documents/wlc_w_proofs/">question 135 of the larger catechism</a>, if you're interested). When the Lord tells us not to murder, he is also telling us to actively protect the lives and the well-being of those around us. Doriani's example is hand rails in staircases: a simple measure that helps to protect the life and the physical well-being of anyone who might use those stairs. It seems to me that stopping at a crosswalk has a similar implication.<br />
<br />
If you are a not a Christian, it is still common courtesy to follow the Golden Rule, doing unto others as you would have them do unto you. If you are a Christian, it is incumbent upon you to show your Savior's love to all those you encounter, and that love is shown in both the most profound and the most simple of ways, whether they ever know your identity or your faith. Yielding to pedestrians is one of the least of these.Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-37371649859557494042015-09-17T20:28:00.002-06:002015-09-17T21:59:44.458-06:00What's so good about being a Calvinist?<div class="tr_bq">
Came across my copy of <i><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Practical-Calvinist-Various/dp/1857928148/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1442543244&sr=8-1&keywords=the+practical+calvinist">The Practical Calvinist,</a></i> a book that was published in honor of one of my seminary professors, D. Clair Davis, upon his retirement. Following is part of an article that he wrote in the <i>Presbyterian Journal</i> in 1986, under the title above. I was going to quote just two paragraphs, but once I got going, I just couldn't stop. And I'm not even going to apologize. In fact, you're welcome.</div>
<br />
<blockquote>
"Basically, the Five Points tell you how God saves people, and you've been saved for years. What you need to know is how to be a better wife and mother. You need to know how to get ready for your next mid-life crisis. You need to know how to pray when the pain gets sharper. how does being a Calvinist help then?</blockquote>
<blockquote>
"It helps because underneath all those questions about <i>how</i> to live is a much bigger, more essential one: <i>Why bother? </i>How do you know the Lord really cares?</blockquote>
<blockquote>
"You don't ask that one out loud in your Sunday-school class. But you know you're eaten up with worry. You've gotten used to being bored with the Bible. You can't identify with the things the other Christians talk about. You need a fresh start with the Lord. But where do you begin?</blockquote>
<blockquote>
"Now that's where Calvinism really comes through for you. It applies the Bible where you need it the most. Think through the basics. Jesus died for you personally (Personal Atonement). He loves you, not what he can get out of you (Unconditional Election). He pours out his love on every bit of you, not just what you think is your sweeter and nicer side (Total Depravity). His love is stronger than all your doubt and foolishness and fear put together (Irresistible Grace). He keeps on loving you, all the way through to the end (Perseverance of the Saints). That's the Five Points of your Father's love!</blockquote>
<blockquote>
"When you've digested how much the Lord has done for you, then you'll know what you're doing. That's why the Lord kept telling his people, 'Remember the Exodus!' In the middle of the clutter and snarls in your life, keep in mind the Lord's mighty, loving arm that lifted you out of slavery into the Land of Promise. 'He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all - how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?' (Rom 8:31-32).</blockquote>
<blockquote>
"Pondering the five points of God's grace isn't a nostalgia trip. When you're alert about your salvation, then you know what life is all about. When you see how your salvation comes only from the Lord and not a bit from yourself, then you understand a lot of other things too...</blockquote>
<blockquote>
"...After turning away from glorying in yourself, be sure to start glorying in Jesus Christ. If you stop half-way, all you have left is apathy. But the Lord has called you to <i>enjoy</i> him forever. you do that by looking at Philippians 2 and doing some solid thinking about what Jesus gave up for you. Weigh what it meant for him to be a servant. Consider his obedience all the way to death. Try to grasp Jesus Christ crucified, crying out, 'My God, my God, why have you abandoned me!' Now you're ready to start telling yourself and the Lord how wonderful and glorious Jesus Christ is."<br />
<i><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Practical-Calvinist-Various/dp/1857928148/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1442543244&sr=8-1&keywords=the+practical+calvinist"></a></i></blockquote>
<blockquote>
<i><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Practical-Calvinist-Various/dp/1857928148/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1442543244&sr=8-1&keywords=the+practical+calvinist">The Practical Calvinist</a>, </i>pp. 47-49</blockquote>
Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-22427741989387988602015-08-21T23:17:00.000-06:002015-08-22T07:44:44.322-06:00You Is LovedI haven't seen the movie<i> The Help</i>, but I've read the book, and that's almost as good, right? Even if I hadn't read the book, I've been on Pinterest, so I'm familiar with the movie's most famous quote, the one where the black "help" tells the little white girl, "You is kind. You is smart. You is important."<br />
<br />
I spend a lot of time on the Internet, especially since I'm nursing still 6-8 times a day, and I think there are a lot of people floating around in angry cyberspace who need to be affirmed in this way. Not in an anti-micro-aggression, self-esteem-building sort of way, because Lord knows we have enough of those and all that's done is create a bunch of needy monsters. They (we) need a much deeper affirmation, the sort that confers both identity and belonging.<br />
<br />
Our current culture has been fairly proficient at casting off superficial affirmations that conferred superficial identity and superficial belonging. But rather than true healing that needed to take place when those bandaids were ripped off, we (collective America) are much more like the demon-possessed man that Jesus described Matthew 12. We swept the house clean but didn't fill it with anything worthwhile, so that demon returned with seven even worse ones, and now our current state is even worse than it was before. "So also it will be with this evil generation" (Matt 12:45) - I actually just searched for "seven worse demons" for a Bible reference and came up with the whole "generation" quote, and, wow.<br />
<br />
Tonight, my two year old - out of the blue - told my four year old that he was ugly. Just to be sure I heard her correctly, I exclaimed, "What?!?" And she repeated, "Titus, you ugly." And I grabbed her arm and marched her down to her room for a little discussion.<br />
<br />
I wasn't actually sure she knew that what she'd done was wrong, so we sat criss-cross-applesauce, nose-to-nose and knee-to-knee on her floor and I asked, "Did you know that what you were saying was mean?"<br />
"Yes"<br />
"Why did you say it?"<br />
"I don't know."<br />
"Did you think it would be funny?"<br />
"I don't know."<br />
"Did you think it would make you feel good about yourself somehow?"<br />
"I don't know."<br />
"Okay, you're only two, so I don't expect you to know, but here's my guess. I think you thought it would be funny to say something mean to your brother. Even if he was mostly oblivious, it's really dangerous to your heart to get in a habit of saying mean things either to be funny or to somehow otherwise feel good about yourself. I know that it's human nature to make yourself feel better by somehow putting down people around you, but it makes your heart ugly, and that's a lot worse than your face being ugly. If you need to feel better about yourself in the future, you come to mommy or daddy, and we will give you a hug and tell you how much we love you, and how much Jesus loves you."<br />
<br />
Wouldn't it be wonderful if my little girl got this figured out while she was still a little girl and the worst thing she did was tell an oblivious brother that he was ugly? If, by the time she was, say, a teenager, she had an identity that was so rooted in Christ's love and what his death on the cross accomplished for her both now and for eternity, that she could skip junior high insecurities, high school peer pressure, and college dating games, mommy wars and identity politics as an adult?<br />
<br />
You is loved. But it's not because you is kind or you is smart or you is important. There's always going to be somebody kinder, smarter, or more important, so don't base your identity on those things. You is loved for one reason and one reason only: you is Christ's. He died to make you his, and ain't nobody can snatch you out of his hand. Be kind, because you is loved.Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-91281618080498283162015-08-20T15:25:00.000-06:002015-08-20T15:25:15.377-06:00I Would if I Could but I Can'tAs I snuggled with a scared little girl tonight, I almost whispered, "Mommy will always be here for you. I won't let anything bad happen to you." But I didn't, because those are two promises that I can't keep.<br />
<br />
Oh, how I wish that I could. I wish I could promise her that when I go on trips, I will always come back to her. I wish I could promise that I won't let bad things happen to her or to me, to be the mommy she wants me to be, calming all fears, soothing all sorrows.<br />
<br />
My impotence drives me to point her to the Omnipotent one, the one who makes those promises and who can and will keep them. We both abide in the shadow of the Almighty.<br />
<br />
What a grace that God, in all of his God-ish-ness, is for us. That all of the characteristics that make him God - his power, his sovereignty, his omnipresence - is those things for us. Let me say that again: <i>for us</i>. I cannot sleep in two rooms with one sick kid and one scared kid, but God is always with them both. I need to remember this in my exhaustion and my fear, both tonight and always. And they need to learn this, even now when God is often a mere abstraction.<br />
<br />
"Jesus loves me, this I know."<br />
<br />
"The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not be in want."<br />
<br />
Oh, let them learn this now when they are small, to have the faith of a child, so that when they are big they may continue to have faith like a child.<br />
<br />
<br />Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-74026405834735026392015-08-19T21:43:00.000-06:002015-08-19T22:05:36.143-06:00Some Nights<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-SxraUV_LBvE/VdVKfCZ1I5I/AAAAAAAAEEI/cEs6ynNXKRM/s1600/DSC_9247.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-SxraUV_LBvE/VdVKfCZ1I5I/AAAAAAAAEEI/cEs6ynNXKRM/s320/DSC_9247.JPG" width="320" /></a>Some nights, I go to bed so empty and so tired ... just spent from all that it takes to keep three small humans alive and relatively happy. It's worthwhile work, but it can be weary work, and there's just no sugarcoating that fact.<br />
<br />
Some nights, and tonight is one of those nights, I go to bed full. My kids and I had a good day: we colored, we practiced patterns, we picked tomatoes, we ate our lunch out of little compartments in egg cartons, we took good naps, we had a good dinner, we played outside in the golden hour sunlight while daddy worked on the car, we giggled and tickled after baths.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-zYPgXvm4iOg/VdVKxy-VCqI/AAAAAAAAEEY/De846BSOTnk/s1600/DSC_9242.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-zYPgXvm4iOg/VdVKxy-VCqI/AAAAAAAAEEY/De846BSOTnk/s320/DSC_9242.JPG" width="320" /></a><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/--GvKAsJVSLM/VdVKlfdZiuI/AAAAAAAAEEQ/Yebtl25A-gk/s1600/DSC_9261.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/--GvKAsJVSLM/VdVKlfdZiuI/AAAAAAAAEEQ/Yebtl25A-gk/s320/DSC_9261.JPG" width="320" /></a>I read the synposis of the latest Planned Parenthood video today, one where they talk about cutting a baby's head open to "harvest" its brain, while its heart is still beating. I couldn't watch the video for fear of totally undoing myself; the key quotes were enough. And so while I dressed my baby for bed, I particularly savored her perfect little body. The rolls on her legs, the peach-fuzz on her head. Her budding teeth that are causing us both so much grief. I marvel over her and I grieve for mamas everywhere who, for whatever reason, whether they have been deceived or exploited or they have no explanation whatsover, who have empty arms. I grieve for the babies whose souls went straight to heaven before they had a taste of earth. I'm convicted that in the bad days, I take these three little lives for granted, or that I even resent them. I'm so convicted it makes me ache. I want to take back all my wicked thoughts of days when I resent those babies, when I resent the gift that is life, just life, that I didn't create, but that I'm given to steward and to enjoy. I can't take it back, but I can rest in the Blood that covers my past ingratitude and my future short tempers and short-sightedness and short everything.<br />
<br />
Tonight, I am full. But, upon reflection, it is a humble full, one that recognizes that this fulness is a gift, as is the very recognition thereof. I would love to fix the world so that every baby at least sees the light of day. Tonight, I start by asking God to help me treasure what he's given me, and then to let it ripple out from here.<br />
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<br />Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-34916258256280552032015-08-15T10:58:00.000-06:002015-08-15T10:58:50.399-06:00Piper on Psalm 16In light of our church's current sermon series on the Psalms and our pastors' encouragement to us to really own one of the Psalms, I decided to spend some time this weekend meditating on a psalm. Right after I made that decision, Desiring God shared a new sermon from John Piper on Psalm 16, so I am listening to it this morning, thinking that I will make it my goal to "own" Psalm 16 for the rest of the week.<br />
<br />
It's an hour long sermon, so you might not have time to listen to it all at once (though if you do, it will be worth your time). Here's an excerpt I particularly enjoyed just now on using God's attributes to transform our prayers.<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
Now, what in the flow of that worship, happens to his
petition (when you get to verse 8)? “I have set the Lord always before me;
because he is at my right hand, I shall NOT be shaken.” </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
That’s not a request anymore; that’s an affirmation.</blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
So the way I understand verses 1-8 is that what begins as an
aching longing, “Preserve me, O God,” ends with, “I <i>will not</i> be shaken.” “I <i>will </i>be
preserved,” “I <i>will </i>be kept,” “He
will not let me be lost.” </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
And the pathway from the petition, aching and longing, to
the assertion and the affirmation and the confidence, is heralding and exalting
in what God is for us. And I would simply commend to you that way of praying.
Because almost all my beginning in prayer begin the way his does. </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
I seldom begin a worship service or a time of prayer in
solitude red hot for God, totally confident, this is going to go well. This
day, he’s in charge, it’s going to go right, he’ll give me his guidance. My
prayers don’t begin that way. They begin, “HELP!” Which is the way he began,
right? “Preserve me, Oh God.” And then what do you do, stop and wait for
confidence to happen? No, you do what he did … you declare … what He is for
you, and you exalt in what He is for you. And after you do that, through “safe
refuge” and “highest treasure” and “sovereign Lord” and “trusted counselor,”
confidence is rising. And that’s the way this psalm flows.</blockquote>
Here's the whole sermon; stay tuned for a clip in which he talks about verse 3, "<span class="selected" original-title="" style="border: 0px; color: #363030; font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-indent: -3.5em; vertical-align: baseline;">As for </span><span class="" style="border: 0px; color: #363030; font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-indent: -3.5em; vertical-align: baseline;">the saints in the land, they are the excellent ones, </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #363030; font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; text-indent: -4em;">in whom is all my delight."</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #363030; font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; text-indent: -4em;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #363030; font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; text-indent: -4em;"><br /></span>
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="281" mozallowfullscreen="" src="https://player.vimeo.com/video/136249762" webkitallowfullscreen="" width="500"></iframe>
Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-57911626671972811412015-07-19T21:59:00.000-06:002015-07-20T22:42:25.748-06:00Dear Mr. Trump (on Faith and Forgiveness)Dear Mr. Trump,<br />
<br />
Allow me to begin by introducing myself: I am Molly, a 35 year old mother of three with a background in finance, theology, and non-profit. I, like much of red America, like dogs, bacon, my SUV, red wine, and toasted marshmallows dipped in Irish cream.<br />
<br />
I was quite interested to follow your little dust-up this weekend at the Family Leadership Summit, and that is what I'd like to talk to you about right now. I realize that the odds of you reading this are probably even lower than the odds of me voting for you (if that were possible), but I write anyway, because that is what bloggers do.<br />
<br />
I also write because there is something great at stake. Not America, silly, although I, too, would like to see America be great again. I'm talking about your soul.<br />
<br />
What went through your mind on Saturday morning when Mr. Luntz asked you if you had ever asked God for forgiveness? Did you consider lying to him, knowing that's what this Christian audience would want to hear? I find it truly remarkable that you did not say a simple, "yes." I wonder if that's because you have considered what that "yes" would cost you and you don't want to touch it with a ten-foot pole?<br />
<br />
I don't mean to talk down to you, but I considered that "yes" this morning as I had to discipline my two year old for disobedience. After discipline, I asked her to apologize, and she refused. I persisted, not because it makes me feel good to hear her say "I'm sorry," but because of what that "I'm sorry" means for her heart. I asked her if she was afraid to say "I'm sorry," if it would somehow damage her sense of self or her well-being. Even at two, she gets how vulnerable "I'm sorry" makes you. Some might call it pride and leave it at that (there's a lot of that, too), but I've actually thought about this a lot. I understand that it's deeply unnerving to admit to having been wrong, to verbalize it, because it hints at cracks at the very foundation of your being. If I lose this, who am I, and what will I have left?<br />
<br />
I took my little girl's peachy-soft, squeezy cheeks in my hands, I held her face to look in my eyes, and I pleaded with her to understand, first of all, her need for forgiveness, and secondly, the freedom that comes therein. The freedom of knowing that you are loved irrevocably, that your identity is sealed unshakably, that no matter what you do wrong, and however many times, it doesn't change God's -- or this family's -- love for you.<br />
<br />
Mr. Trump, I can't take your cheeks in my hands, and it would be awfully creepy if I did, but let me do it metaphorically: asking God to forgive you may feel like it costs you so much ... too much. But, what good will it do for you if you gain the whole world (to which you sometimes seem very close) but lose your soul?<br />
<br />
I find it telling that, when asked about your faith, you responded, "I own many of the most beautiful buildings in the world." You are a true American, Mr. Trump, but I don't mean that in a complimentary sense this time. I mean that you have substituted faith in yourself, in your bootstraps, for faith in your Maker. I just heard in church Sunday morning <a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=genesis+11&version=NIV">how God feels about tall buildings</a>, and I'll give you a hint: he's not super impressed, especially when they are a means for people to believe that they no longer have need for God.<br />
<br />
In case you're not sure what I'm talking about, I'm referring to the tower of Babel, where God confused the ambitious builders' languages and foiled their plans. In this judgment also came mercy. If we are convinced that we don't need God, do we then really not need him? Or are we simply comfortably deceived, for God has given us the grave judgment of leaving us to our own devices, a truly hopeless condition given the God-sized chasm between mankind and the Almighty. Mr. Trump, you may have the best architects in the world, but they cannot build for you that bridge.<br />
<br />
Jesus is on record as saying that it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of God. You are a very rich man, as we all know, but that does not mean that the Kingdom of God is out of reach for you. The very next thing that Jesus said is, "<a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+19%3A26&version=NIV">With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.</a>"<br />
<br />
Mr. Trump, your antics this past weekend may have cost you the race, but you have so much more to gain. Today, if you hear His voice, let Mr. Luntz's questions about faith and forgiveness be a wake-up call to you. Today can be a day of salvation.<br />
<br />Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-9137174883316736622015-07-10T14:17:00.002-06:002015-07-10T14:17:59.832-06:00Every Hour I Need Thee<br />
I've been on vacation this week - just me and JR and the perfect child* (*needless to say, I say this tongue in cheek) in a resort where I have nary a care in the world. So few cares and responsibilities, I almost (almost) don't know what to so with myself (there is a beach and Downton Abbey season 5 on Amazon, so I've managed).<br />
<br />
We are at a conference for JR's work, and at this morning's worship session, we sang, "I need you, oh, I need you" to the Lord and the thought struck me that I haven't felt nearly so desperate for a Savior this week, not to mention "every hour."<br />
<br />
I've been well-rested. I haven't sighed as I broke up another fight or cleaned up another spill or calmed another over-tired overreaction. I haven't cooked. I haven't cleaned. I didn't miss any flights or have delays. People have been uniformly kind and polite to me and, in short, I have had no external triggers for sinful responses.<br />
<br />
Yet the battle still wages for my soul, a battle of self-sufficiency, of pride, of complacency ... Of forgetting that I depend on God for life and breath and everything else.<br />
<br />
In my normal life, I don't love every moment of struggling to get through to the next. I'm so grateful for two sets of grandparents who are giving us a full week of respite while the kiddos remain in the most excellent of care. But I have a renewed perspective on my difficult parenting moments, and it's that my two short sinners cause me to cast myself into the arms of my Savior on a much more regular basis than I would otherwise.<br />
<br />
I need them to point me to Jesus, whether they know it or not. They need me to point them to Jesus. Our never ending mission in life is to stand hand-in-hand at the foot of cross. We'll plunge back into life on Sunday morning singing together with renewed vigor, "I need thee, oh I need thee / every hour I need thee. Oh bless me now my Savior, I come to thee."Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-90628965527455735252015-06-29T14:57:00.000-06:002015-06-29T14:57:24.745-06:00He Restores My Soulfrom CCEF's book<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Heart-Matter-Reflections-Changing-Hearts/dp/1936768658/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1435611300&sr=8-2&keywords=heart+of+the+matter"> <i>Heart of the Matter</i></a>, David Powlison on Psalm 23 (November 16, which is taken from a booklet called <i>I'm Exhausted</i>.)<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
More than any other passage, Psalm 23 brought Jesus to life for me in my struggles with fatigue. The psalm is full of promises - he provides, he restores my soul, he is with me, his goodness and mercy pursue me all of my days. Make this psalm your own. Jesus, your good Shepherd, will fill you with confidence. God doesn't meet us the way we want, but he does restore us. No matter what you are facing, you have a Shepherd who is with you, restoring you, and bringing good things -- himself -- into your life. Learn to trust him, and you truly have something worth living and dying for.</blockquote>
<br />
Powlison has written quite a lot on Psalm 23, and it's all brilliant. I aspire to make this psalm a dear old friend like that, rather than just a celebrity that everybody knows about but that we don't actually really know.Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-80731954612380802122015-06-23T11:23:00.001-06:002015-06-23T11:23:40.717-06:00UndeservingSometimes I have to work hard to be thankful, and sometimes it just washes over me in waves.<br />
<br />
One of the "waves" times is at night, when I check in my children as they are sleeping. Even if it has been a hard day, those sweet, beautiful, peaceful faces stop my heart briefly and I am overcome with gratitude for their lives and that those lives intersect so closely with mine.<br />
<br />
This thankful reverence usually brings with it a healthy dose of fear, as I remember what a great responsibility it is to be caring for, shepherding, these souls. These fully human souls (in tiny bodies) that have just as strong of desires and ambitions, and eternity of destinies, as my own. It's not as though God looked at me and said, "She's up for this task!" In fact, God continually looks upon me and says, "You are not up for the task, but I love you so much I will grant you -- totally undeserving you -- the joy of caring for these small lives while giving grace upon grace to make up for your insufficiencies."<br />
<br />
In the best possible way, joy, thankfulness, dependence, and supplication mingle together and overflow from my heart in prayer. This must be how the psalms were written.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>"<span class="chapter-2"><span class="text Ps-86-1">Incline your ear, O <span class="small-caps" style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span>, and answer me,</span></span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-86-1">for I am poor and needy.</span></span><br /><span class="text Ps-86-2" id="en-ESV-15287"><sup class="versenum">2 </sup>Preserve my life, for I am godly;</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-86-2">save your servant, who trusts in you—you are my God.</span></span><br /><span class="text Ps-86-3" id="en-ESV-15288"><sup class="versenum">3 </sup>Be gracious to me, O Lord,</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-86-3">for to you do I cry all the day.</span></span><br /><span class="text Ps-86-4" id="en-ESV-15289"><sup class="versenum">4 </sup>Gladden the soul of your servant,</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-86-4">for to you, O Lord, do I lift up my soul.</span></span><br /><span class="text Ps-86-5" id="en-ESV-15290"><sup class="versenum">5 </sup>For you, O Lord, are good and forgiving,</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-86-5">abounding in steadfast love to all who call upon you.</span></span><br /><span class="text Ps-86-6" id="en-ESV-15291"><sup class="versenum">6 </sup>Give ear, O <span class="small-caps" style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span>, to my prayer;</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-86-6">listen to my plea for grace."</span></span></i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Ps-86-6"><i>Psalm 86:1-6</i></span></span> </div>
Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-47232680996746060052015-06-18T20:41:00.002-06:002015-06-18T22:10:38.373-06:00Now, faith<i>Hebrews 11:1 - "Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen."</i><br />
<br />
Today I was edgy with anxiety, and it wasn't until I realized that my anxiety stemmed from faith in a false god that the edge wore off and I could repent and proceed with my day. By this I mean that I was anxious that there wouldn't be enough of something about which God has said, "Don't count on this to make you happy and secure." Of things like this, there can never be enough to satisfy: money, power, affection, obedient kids, health, relationships, cars that don't break, houses that don't leak.<br />
<br />
The recent death of Elisabeth Elliot and the subsequent spotlight on her life are a powerful reminder that our only hope must be in Christ, and our only guarantee is that He will be faithful no matter what trials life in this fallen world may bring.<br />
<br />
In other words: death, taxes ... and Jesus. Oh, sweet Jesus. May the trials of earth grow strangely dim in the light of his glory and grace. (Don't worry if this is mostly aspirational; God promises to complete the work he has begun in you, including the changing of our affections.)<br />
<br />
Which brings me to Hebrews 11:1. There are many things we hope for in this life, but the stuff of faith involves trusting God that though we do not see him, though we do not necessarily see the earthly fulfillment of his promises, though we do not see the underside of the quilt in how he is working all things for our good and his glory, we rest confidently knowing that what is truly important, what is truly best, is irrevocably, inevitably, and eternally ours in Christ.<br />
<br />
Now, what was it that I was so anxious about this morning?Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-1489046331498142602015-06-15T21:00:00.001-06:002015-06-15T21:18:33.065-06:00ImpossibleWhat, in your daily practices, do you think pleases God? I am applying this to myself in parenting, but go ahead and extrapolate into your own life circumstances. No, really, stop and think about it; I'll wait.<br />
<br />
...<br />
<br />
At first blush, I want to ask you if you think clean clothes folded and put into dressers, an empty sink, and bathed kids do ... but that's too easy of a target.<br />
<br />
Going a little deeper, maybe you secretly think that it's well-fed, well-behaved, well-scheduled kids? That surely pleases me.<br />
<br />
Or maybe you recognize that what's more important is what's going on in your relationship -- that you didn't snap at the kids today (or apologized when you did), that you gently and patiently corrected them, that you knelt down and looked them in the eyes as you listened to them and spent quality time with them, that they are happy and secure.<br />
<br />
What if I told you that it's all of this, and it's none of this?<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<i><a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Hebrews+11%3A6&version=ESV">Without faith, it is impossible to please God</a>.</i></blockquote>
Jesus talks in Matthew 19 about the kind of life that tries to please God apart from faith. He's specifically talking about the sense of self-sufficiency that money brings; but, really, any sort of self-sufficient, bootstrap mentality is equally guilty: "<span class="text Matt-19-24" id="en-ESV-23784"><span class="woj"><a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+19:24&version=ESV">Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich person to enter the kingdom of God</a>." That's the bad news. </span></span>The good news is this: "<span class="text Matt-19-26" id="en-ESV-23786"><span class="woj"><a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+19%3A26&version=ESV">With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.</a>"</span></span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span class="text Matt-19-26" id="en-ESV-23786"><span class="woj"> </span></span><i><a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Hebrews+11%3A6&version=ESV">Without faith, it is impossible to please God</a>.</i></blockquote>
Faith in what? Faith that your worst mothering moments are never so bad
that God cannot (or will not) forgive and redeem. Faith that your best
mothering moments are never good enough to please a God so holy that he
only accepts absolute perfection in thought and deed. Faith -- reliance, resting -- in a perfect
Christ who died for you at your best and for you at your worst. Faith that <i>Christ </i>pleases God and because you are united to him (by faith), you cannot help but please God.<br />
<br />
Now, this leaves us here in our quest to please God: <a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Galatians+5%3A6&version=NIV">"The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love."</a> Love like you have been forgiven, love like you have been redeemed -- and believe (have faith) that, indeed, you have. Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-87023897120599453712015-06-08T22:40:00.000-06:002015-06-08T22:49:45.266-06:00Cue the Spiritual AnalogyI was lecturing my son on the way home from a birthday party last night and when I got to the zenith of my pontification and paused mid-breath, my sweet husband interjected: "Cue the spiritual analogy!"<br />
<br />
Why, yes!<br />
<br />
You see, at this party, there was a fantastic inflatable water slide / splash pool / bounce house, and it was teeming with happy kids when we got there. My little boy wanted to do it, but fear or pride held him back. I know him, and I knew how much fun he would have, and so I asked him to trust me and get in. When that didn't work, I forced him to put on his swimming suit (cue tears in the bathroom) and I not-so-gently coaxed him to give it a shot. It took mere seconds for tears to evaporate into laughter.<br />
<br />
I waited for the "I told you so" moment until we were in the car, although I hinted at it several times previously.<br />
<br />
You guys, I love being right.<br />
<br />
More than that, though, I love to see my son be filled with joy, laughter spilling out of every fiber of his being. I love to see this so much that I will force his swimming suit on through tears, and I will throw him down a water slide despite great protestations and more tears.<br />
<br />
And, cue the spiritual analogy.... You see it, right?<br />
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While I did the dishes tonight, I<a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Psalm%2090&version=ESV"> listened to Psalm 90 </a>(aside: did you know that you can listen to Max McLean read the ESV at biblegateway.com? It wasn't that long ago that I was super cutting edge because so had the whole Bible on CD, filling up a big binder with CDs). Verse 14: "Satisfy us in the morning with your steadfast love, that we may rejoice and be glad all our days."<br />
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This is not the only verse in the Bible about filling us up with joy in Christ; you can't flip a page in the Psalms without seeing something about joy or satisfaction, hungering and thirsting for God, just because being near him is the most satisfying and delightful thing we could do. God knows this better than anybody else, and he is not content to let us stand on the side of the waterslide in our street clothes. He loves us so much that he's going to do what it takes to get our swimming suits on and to get us down that slide, even if it takes an unceremonious dumping to get us started.<br />
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Friends, don't miss out: put on your own swimsuit and jump in. I recommend <a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Psalm%2090&version=ESV">Psalm 90</a> or maybe <a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Psalm%2063&version=ESV">Psalm 63</a> for getting your toes wet.Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-56027098446347732732015-05-30T09:37:00.000-06:002015-05-30T09:49:11.557-06:00Laden with Guilt and Full of FearsIt's hard to fall asleep when, just before bedtime, you read of the sudden and tragic death of a five year old boy just a few miles from the home where your own boy of similar age and stature rests. I didn't know him, but it doesn't take a whole lot of imagination for me to wonder if his mom woke up this morning (if she slept last night), suddenly remembered, and then wondered how she was going to keep breathing today.<i> (Oh Lord, I don't even know what this looks like, but please show your mercy to them today.)</i><br />
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This world is full of flukes and outliers that can make even tame-ol' Billings, MT feel like a dangerous place to live. Just yesterday on Facebook, I saw news that a baby had died sleeping in a swing much like the one that currently sits 8 feet from me. Danger lurks in both the obvious and the innocent, and this realization brings with it crushing fear.<br />
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Layer upon this fear my guilt. You guys, I am a yeller. I say this despite my own disbelief and the shock that accompanies each time I yell at my kids. I don't believe it until, once again, I've snapped. The kids are bouyant, yadda yadda yadda; but this is not how I want to be, and it grieves me that this has become part of my parenting repertoire.<br />
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I bait my husband when I tell him I feel like this because I want him to assure me that I am a good mother, and he complies; but the guilt remains.<br />
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What can wash away my sins? Certainly not the love of my husband. What can make me whole again, free from my fear? Not all the jealous love and safeguards I can muster.<br />
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It's hard to sleep well with these burdens on my back. <a href="https://twitter.com/ScottyWardSmith/status/604485969505611776">Last night, Scotty Smith tweeted, "The Gospel is true; sleep well."</a><br />
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"Nothing but the love of Jesus." If this is really true, how does it work? How does the Gospel lay me down to sleep? It works through a lifetime of choosing to believe, of mindfully rejecting lies that say anything will keep me or my kids safe or happy apart from the love of Christ, of repenting of my unbelief and saying, "Oh Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!"<br />
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The Gospel tells me -- and the cross proves to me -- that God's wisdom is higher than mine and his love combined with his wisdom always do what is best. The Gospel tells me that my children are not my highest good, and I am not theirs. I am very much tempted regularly to believe the former,
and I am very much convinced much of the time of the latter; but neither of
those are actually good for me or my children. I find my sense of significance in how well I am parenting, Pinteresting, and providing; and I find my security in my children's safety, comfort, and health. Contra all of this, all that we need is Jesus. Freedom from guilt and fear will come in increasing measure the more we believe this.<br />
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In this world of so many options, we have occasion to try out many fountains for a taste of true life. But there is only one fount whose flow is so precious as to save. "No other fount I know / Nothing but the blood of Jesus."<br />
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<i>(PS - The title of this post is from <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NQo6kBtYcpc">Indelible Grace's song of the same title</a>; what I find remarkable in re-listening to the song is the emphasis on Scripture. "Laden with guilt and full of fears
/ I fly to Thee, my Lord /
And not a glimpse of hope appears /
But in Thy written Word
/ The volumes of my Father's grace
/ Does all my griefs assuage
/ Here I behold my Saviors face
/ In every page." </i>Tolle lege.<i>)</i><br />
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<br />Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10600153.post-53581141157105470322015-05-24T16:03:00.001-06:002015-05-24T16:03:54.925-06:00HollandaiseA few hours ago, I posted a somewhat snarky update on Facebook, that we were celebrating Pentecost by eating Hollandaise sauce, that glorious French concoction that makes me really glad (among other reasons) that God has been working throughout history to redeem what went wrong at the Tower of Babel.<br />
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It was snarky, but it was also true. And, thinking of Hollandaise always reminds me of a favorite passage in my favorite book:<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
Food these days is often identified as the enemy. Butter, salt, sugar, eggs are all out to get you. And yet at our best we know better. Butter is ... well, butter: it glorifies almost everything it touches. Salt is the sovereign perfecter of all flavors. Eggs are, pure and simple, one of the wonders of the world. And if you put them all together, you get not sudden death, but Hollandaise - which in its own way is not one bit less a marvel than the Gothic arch, the computer chip, or a Bach fugue. </blockquote>
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In case you've missed me waxing eloquent about this book before (it's been a few months), that was from the preface to the second edition of <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Supper-Lamb-Culinary-Reflection-Paperbacks/dp/0375760563/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1432504575&sr=8-1&keywords=supper+of+the+lamb"><i>The Supper of the Lamb</i> by Robert Farrar Capon</a> (p xxvii, to be exact).<br />
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You know what I love most about this book? It's the fact that he can simultaneously make me long both for heaven and for earth, to whet my appetites for both more, because both are part and parcel of an appetite that can only be satisfied by the glory of God.<br />
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The rest of that quote: <br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
If this book has any claim to make, therefore, it is that food is precisely an epiphany of the greatness of our nature -- or, to use the most accurate theological word of all, it is a sacrament, a real presence of the gorgeous mystery of our being. People have responded to <i>The Supper of the Lamb</i>, I think, because after all the modern reductionism about food ("Food is only a necessity," "Food is nothing but nourishment"), it gave them solid reasons for glorying in the truth they had suspected all along; namely, that food was life, and that life was good...<br />
Food, like all other triumphs of human nature, is evidence of civilization - of that priestly gift by which we lift the whole world into the exchanges of the Ultimate City which even God himself longs to see it become.</blockquote>
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
...We are not simply the users of creation; we are, all of us, called to be its offerers. The world will be lifted, as it was always meant to be, by our priestly love. We <i>can</i>, you see, take it with us. It will precisely because we loved this Old Jerusalem of a world enough to bear it in our bones that its textures will ascend when we rise; it will be because our eyes have relished the earth that the colors of its countries will compel our hearts forever. The bread and pastry, the cheeses, the wines, and the songs go into the Supper of the Lamb because we do: it is our love that brings the City home.</blockquote>
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I am reminded of the old hymn, "Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus" and the line, <i>"and the things of earth will grow strangely dim / in the light of his glory and grace...</i>" I know what the song is trying to say, but you know what's remarkable about seeing things "in the light of his glory and grace"? Everything on earth doesn't grow dim; it comes into sharper focus.<br />
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Pain comes into sharper focus because it reminds us of the seriousness of sin.<br />
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Joy comes into sharper focus because it points us to the Giver and the greatest of all joys.<br />
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Life comes into sharper focus because there is meaning to every moment, large and small. There is movement, there is a purpose, and there is a <i>telos</i>.<br />
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There are a few hours left in this day: don't waste your Pentecost! Make some Hollandaise, make some curry, heck, order a pizza and have some wine with it (yay, Italy!). Consider doing it with some friends. And give thanks to the one who designed all these cultures and will bring all of these amazing flavors together in the ultimate Supper of the Lamb.Mollyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08182085430454471355noreply@blogger.com0